“Fucked off you bitch! What the hell is happening to you? I don’t understand you anymore! You don’t speak with me; I want sex but you seems exhausted and without interest anymore. What the hell, everything sucks right now and I don’t know what is wrong with you. I don’t know you anymore. You don’t do anything that will connect between you and me as husband and wife. You are contented doing something just for yourself. You don’t ask me anything about what you thought, unlike before. I am tired of this.”

Whoops never think that was me and husband, because we never had such horrible fight. (Giggles) Those were just some scene I saw from the movie. Maybe it is also happening to you right now? That was possible to happen even in those people from your neighborhood.

As far as I concerned, there is no other differences from the scene in the movies over the real life.

I woke up this morning, October 10, 2011. My husband was preparing himself to go to meeting far from the city. Before he left, he made me coffee as he usually done for me. While he was preparing the coffee, I looked at him and remembered the other day conversation.

(Conversation below; Red was me, and Blue is my husband)

Few days back, after watching the movie my attention was turned to my husband. I asked him,

“Honey, do you remember when the last time we fight about something else was?”

He responded,

“I don’t remember honey because that was long time ago, I don’t even remember what it was all about.”

“But we didn’t have any serious fight about something honey, we just didn’t understand much each other that time, it wasn’t serious fight, or was it?”

“No it wasn’t serious honey, we always have misunderstanding before we got married but that was just for few minutes”.

“Oh yeah, that is right honey, we ended up smiling again before the day ends”. (Giggling)

“Yes we were honey.”

“Nowadays, we never fight, no more. Isn’t weird honey? I mean, it was long time ago but we never have any misunderstanding”.

“I was also thinking about that, but it’s good right?


That was a very serious conversation between me and my husband few days back. All we know was, we have this daily communication before we slept. We asked each other if we are happy, and want something. If am sad from time to time, he just always asked what I need to be happy, if I want something or should he do something to make me feel better. That’s how we worked on our daily life. We are keeping our communication alive and active all the time. I must say, that is the secret of our marriage.

What I meant from that was everything might happen same like scene from the movie, if we don’t concentrate and considered our partners opinion and happiness. Relationship can be worst and nevertheless, goes in a wrong path. That is totally harsh, but yet true.

Nowadays, everything should evolve. You as a person, and you as someone who needs to be responsible in this term relationship, perhaps you might find it really not useful, but the truth is, we must, and we should. However, relationship is not just a term that usually people talks about; it’s about you person to other person, sharing, loving, understanding, that connects to the word responsible and consideration.

You might consider it as petty word, is it? I am not professional in terms of relationship, but I considered myself knowledgeable enough to share.

Oh yeah, never say thank you to me, I am glad to share. (Just kidding)


5 comments on “WHY NOT FIGHTING?

  1. Hi Anicka,

    Very nice & serious writing again 🙂

    I believe that life should not be easy as we want. There should be some kind of ups & downs are required like roads in scattered area. If our life will be easy or smooth; it should be like machine rather than human life.

    Fighting with each-other give you chance to know each other better. If one is away due to such fight; other person will realize why he/she feel lonely even everything good around. It gives you more warm feelings for other.

    In my life, we fight many times but it takes one day to 1 week to get solution. In this period, we feel what was wrong and why it was happened. For your information, my marriage has completed 20 yrs and will last long.

    In India, majority have same kind of problems but solutions come by themselves or by meeting & discussion with family members & friends. In India, divorce not happened that much easily; it is hardly 3-5 %.

    As per my knowledge, in western countries, honey, sweetheart, darling, I love you, baby are common but divorce are at higher side. These words are easy to speak but tough to implement them. Western people are not easy to compromise as compared to Indians. They have own ego and own life to get new bf or gf or new partner for future life. I have seen people surprised when I say my marriage completed 20 yrs with single woman.

    I wish and sure your marriage will complete years like me and not like other western people.

    Hope you would like & believe my comments. This way you may get some idea of culture of Indians.

    Warm regards & keep posting.


    • Hello there. 😀

      Thank you for stopping by again. I also believed that every relationship must go ups and down from time to time, and I will not deny that my husband has misunderstanding too, but never last for so long, which is good.. 😀 It’s bad feelings when always fighting so as much as possible we are avoiding that situation. 😀

      I agree that western country have lots of divorce issue and I am aware with that. One of the reason why my husband don’t want to marry same nationality like him, because he doesn’t want divorce, he wanted to have woman who is family minded,,, Whoops,, that’s me… 🙂 Just kidding..

      I wanted to congratulate you for your awesome relationship with your wife. 😀 Cheers!!!!

      Best regards,

  2. Dear Anicka,

    Thanks for your warm words & understanding my comments in a positive way. Thanks for your compliments for my happy marriage life.

    I wish your marriage relationship remains closed forever as your hubby wishes.

    Take care,


    • Hello Rajesh,
      I always put compliment to those people who stayed happy in their marriage. I never doubt to give compliment to your marriage too, because I know that just few people in this tough world can survive from the challenges itself, within relationship and marriage. 😀

      Thank you for wishing me luck for my relationship with my husband. 🙂
      Pleasant day to you! 😀


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